It’s an octopus with a shark’s face. Or maybe it’s a shark with tentacles. Whatever, it’s Sharktopus, and it’s the star of the film. I mean it too; some movies bury their monsters under huge amounts of exposition, unnecessary character development, dialogue and plot. Not Sharktopus (2010). This is a film that knows what we’re here to see — an absolutely ridiculous sea monster rampaging in broad daylight while bikini-clad sunbathers scream and square-jawed heroes pepper the beast with useless machine-gun fire. Sound like your kind of flick? It is. It really is.

A secret military laboratory creates the beast and turns it loose on the coast of sunny Mexico. Then, a passing speedboat knocks off the creature’s remote control dog collar, and it immediately goes rogue, snatching scantily clad sunbathers off of beaches and suchlike. The head scientist behind the project (Eric Roberts!) sends his sexy daughter (Sara Maracul Lane) and a generic, macho hero (Kerem Bursin) on a mission to capture the thing alive. Of course, none of this plot stuff lasts very long without being interrupted by an awesome sharktopus attack. You gotta love monsters that aren’t camera shy!

Almost all of the scenes happen on beaches, yachts or near swimming pools. I wouldn’t be surprised if most of the actors did this film for free. Think back. The last time you vacationed in Mexico, did you get talked into yelling and waving your arms around for a few seconds in front of a camera? If you were too drunk to remember, watch Sharktopus carefully. Is that you disappearing down a giant CGI mouth after doing a giggly arm flail on the cabana? Way to go, movie star!

As a made-for-television movie, the sex, violence and language are all kept in check, which actually works in the movie’s favour. Without the protracted death scenes you’d expect from, say, Piranha 3-D (2010), the film doesn’t get too bogged down with gory details, and the sharktopus attacks remain pleasingly sudden. Things get a tad messier later on, but it’s still not a deal-breaker for 10-year-olds who have already seen, for example, The Dark Knight (2008).

This is a fun movie that you can’t help but enjoy. Many of you have already been turned off of the whole “crazy shark monster” genre by the occasionally-fun-yet-crushingly-dull Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus (2009), and I can’t say that I blame you. But if not, then Sharktopus has the potential to make you at least mildly enthusiastic about the genre again. Just in time for bad movie maestro Fred Olen Ray’s upcoming Super Shark (2011)! (Have you seen the trailer for Super Shark yet? A giant shark waddles onto dry land, and gets kicked in the face by a walking tank! Holy cow!)