With over 250 bands sliding through this year’s Sled Island, deciding between shows might make you a feel like a sugar-buzzed kid in a candy shop. Fear not, festival tobogganers, as the following recommendations for Friday, June 25 and Saturday, June 26 should satisfy your sweet tooth, no matter what it craves.

Monotonix at Tubby Dog

Let’s get right down to it — this might be the best show of the fest. The Israeli maniacs’ last appearance in Calgary was legendary, but at rush hour on a Friday inside the tiny confines of Tubby Dog, their insane antics could shut down all of 17th Ave. And hey, if you miss this one, Monotonix rock again Friday night with The King Khan and BBQ Show at Dicken’s Pub.

Fake Jazz

Following up their first night of weirdness at Broken City on Wednesday, Vancouver’s Fake Jazz collective have also curated this Friday all-ages event at The New Black Centre. Catch Calgary’s Beneath These Idle Tides, anti-dance dance music from Edmonton’s Zebra Pulse, plus Vancouver’s Aerosol Constellations, Ahna and Black Dicks (featuring members of Shearing Pinx and Stamina Mantis).

Olympic Plaza

The lineup for this Friday main-stage show is both stacked and genre-spanning, with The Summerlad’s space rock, Malajube’s francophone indie-pop, Biz Markie’s old-school hip hop, Anvil’s thrash metal, Holy Fuck’s dance-rock, The Breeders’s classic alt-rock and Liars’ awe-inspiring art-rock (catch them again at Dicken’s Pub on Saturday). However, perhaps the most inspiring act will be M5, young expatriates from the Congo performing heart-on-sleeve pop tunes like “Oh Beautiful Canada.”

HEALTH

This Los Angeles quartet creates some seriously futuristic music, blasting laser-gun guitars into alien electronics, propulsive dance beats and dreamlike vocals. They’re playing two great gigs Friday night: Broken City with No Gold, Azeda Booth, Japandroids and Ladyhawk, plus The Marquee Room with Mt. Royal, Puberty and Twin Crystals.

Jon-Rae Fletcher and the Stolen Organ Family Band

If you’ve got a taste for twang, this pair of B.C.-based acts performing at Vern’s on Friday might be your favourite discoveries of the fest. The Stolen Organs mix the Meat Puppets, Jonathan Richman and Ian Svenonius with junky keyboards, while Fletcher’s full-throated hollers and classy country–gospel rambles are far more traditional, but no less impressive.

Tricky Woo

According to an inside source, there’s a longstanding beef between these glammy Montreal rockers and both King Khan and Mark Sultan, dating back to an altercation with their previous band The Spaceshits. Even if we don’t see any fists flying, there will be definitely be some pumping when Tricky Woo hit the stage Friday night at The Palomino and Saturday at Vern’s.

Gift of Gab

Spitting rhymes with the speed of a court stenographer, this MC from hip hop crew Blackalicious returns to Calgary, following his appearance at Slam City Jam in 2006. If you’re not ending your Friday night with Monotonix or the surprise guests at the No. 1 Legion, Gab’s 1 a.m. gig at Local 522 should be bangin’.

Femmes Fatales

This Saturday daytime all-ages show at the Artlife gallery features a group of Calgary’s finest female musicians (plus a fella named Danny Vescarelli). Catch Consonant C-offshoots Clea Anais and The Doer & The Doddler, plus Foonyap, A Relative Distance and INDIENSOCI.

Bayonets!!!

Featuring ex-members of The Wolfnote and Mark Birtles Project, this Edmonton super-band (no, that’s not an oxymoron) offers jagged post-punk blasts with a twisted sense of humour. Catch Bayonetts!!! on Saturday night at Broken City alongside Lucid 44, Obits, The Wicked Awesomes and Sharp Ends.

The Bronx

These L.A. rockers are such badasses that they were personally selected by Pat Smear of The Germs, Nirvana and Foo Fighters to perform as Black Flag in the Germs biopic What We Do is Secret. Get ready for a gnarly mosh pit at the Distillery Saturday night, with an opening set from the almighty Whitey Houston.

Colin Newman Presents

Calgary’s Sub-linguals and Women spark off this stacked show at the Warehouse Saturday night, presented by the 2009 festival guest curator and member of legendary art-punk band Wire. Alongside sets from HEALTH and Holy Fuck, Newman’s other group Githead will make their North American debut.

Myelin Sheaths and The Moby Dicks

Kicking ass and taking names, this pair of garage rock acts prove that Lethbridge is the best bridge. Catch Myelin Sheaths, a side project of Endangered Ape’s Paul Lawton featuring two femme fatale frontwomen of their own, opening for Liars at Dicken’s Pub on Friday. The Moby Dicks strip it down Mark Sultan style with some raw, incredibly charming tunes, stand-up drumming and the tallest bassist in the land. They’re performing with Edmonton’s Michael Rault and Calgary’s Hazard Lights at an awesome all-ages show Saturday night at Tubby Dog.