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More and more people are looking at how they can cull their consumption in December. 'It’s become part of the public consciousness that we’re spending too much at Christmastime,' says Buy Nothing Christmas founder Aiden Enns.

It’s a tiresome tradition. Every December, North Americans pack into malls and big-box stores, hunting down pricey new gifts for friends and family as tinny Christmas carols fill the air with contrived nostalgia. Obnoxious ads urge us to spend, spend, spend — and often we oblige, even though we already buy too much. On average, Canadians plan to spend more than $1,200 on Christmas gifts and entertaining this year, according to a recent RBC survey (and while that stat may seem high to some, it’s low compared to past years).

Christmas is allegedly about peace and goodwill, but for many people the commercialized version is exhausting, frustrating and disappointing. “We all feel so shitty about the whole thing,” says Calgarian Jay Baydala. “We buy all this stuff and we feel awful consistently.”

But hark: there’s hope! A backlash is mounting against this Yuletide excess, and alternatives abound. More and more people are re-examining the way they do Christmas, and many are skipping the mall routine altogether. “Most of the stuff that’s out there is overpriced, unnecessary and just really contributing to a very negative manufacturing industry,” says Heather Whelan, another Calgarian who opts out of the commercial-Christmas madness.

Even those who peddle consumerism acknowledge that it wears on people this time of year. At CrossIron Mills, the sprawling new megamall north of Calgary, the holiday press kit dismissively refers to “the usual holiday hubbub,” promising instead a “distinctive atmosphere” where shoppers can “shed your frustration with the season.” Clearly, people are ready for a change.

BEYOND CONSUMERISM

Those who go to the mall — any mall — hoping to shed seasonal frustration will probably be let down. Nine years ago, a group of Canadian Mennonites came up with another idea: Don’t buy anything for Christmas. “It just grossed me out how negligent people of faith were when it came to consumer bingeing in the name of religion,” says Buy Nothing Christmas founder Aiden Enns. The group created ads and posters that encouraged people to “say ‘enough’ and join a movement dedicated to reviving the original meaning of Christmas.” Another poster shows an icon of Jesus alongside the question: “Where did I say that you should buy so much stuff to celebrate my birthday?”

Nine years later, Enns regards the movement he started as old news — and that’s a good thing, he says. People of all backgrounds, religious and otherwise, are increasingly joining the trend of looking at how they can cull their consumption in December. “It’s become part of the public consciousness that we’re spending too much at Christmastime,” says Enns, editor of Winnipeg-based Geez magazine. “We have to move to a new paradigm.”

Baydala also observed that shift in public mood a few years back. Yet Christmas spending in North America was still ridiculously high, even exceeding $1 trillion by some estimates. Baydala heard that a fraction of that sum could lift developing countries out of poverty. “The math just went cha-ching,” he says. “If we just refocused one out of 20 gifts and did this other thing, then we could change the world forever.”

With this “refocusing” in mind, Baydala founded UEnd (formerly called ChristmasFuture), a charity that sells online gift cards that are spent on projects in the developing world (the gift cards’ recipients pick which projects they want to support). Other organizations offer similar gift programs that redirect North Americans’ Christmas money to people who really need it (Ten Thousand Villages, for example, sells “living gifts” that provide education and gardening tools for people in developing countries). The concept resonates because so many people are looking for ways to go beyond consumerism at Christmas, says Baydala. “I think that’s one of the beauties of it, and why it sort of catches on — because it already is everyone’s idea.”

Others are simply scaling back their Christmas gift buying, and not just because of the recession. Take Whelan, for example. Instead of buying iPods and other expensive electronics and toys at big-box stores, her family only does stocking stuffers. Last year, she bought most of the goods for her four-year-old daughter’s stocking at local craft fairs. “What’s great about that is you can support a lot of local artists or just people that have their own business on the side,” she says.

And what about gifts for friends? “I always tell them I would just rather have a party and see them then try and go to a mall and buy gifts for all of them,” says Whelan.

Tara Nychkalo, another Calgarian who avoids consumer Christmas, says that for her, the season is more about spending time with family than swapping merchandise. She participates in gift swaps at work, but does her best to keep it minimalist. “As long as it’s in the spirit of Christmas and intended to be fun and celebratory, that’s great,” says Nychkalo, who manages communications for Big Rock Brewery. “As soon as it leads into breaking the bank and creating stress, it kind of defeats the purpose I think.”

PRESENCE, NOT PRESENTS

While most people agree that presence is more important than presents, unplugging from the commercial-Christmas machine can be tricky. “It was very hard on my family,” recalls Enns. He and his wife decided they didn’t want to buy anything for Christmas. Other family members, however, expected the buying routine to continue. “Early on, it was awkward and even difficult, because it’s introducing conflict when you don’t really want any, especially around core values,” he says.

Ria Meronek, a counsellor at the Calgary Counselling Centre, says it’s important for people to examine their Christmas expectations. Do others expect you to buy them pricey gifts — or do you expect that of yourself? Usually it’s the latter, she says. “They’re thinking that ‘I have to do this.’” In that case, it can be helpful to reflect on motives, adds Meronek. “If it’s duty or obligation like ‘I should’ or ‘I ought to,’ then there’s a wrong energy behind it.”

When someone expects you to keep buying at Christmas even if you’re not comfortable with it, Meronek says it’s best to be up front. “It’s just about being honest and going to them and saying, for whatever reasons, ‘This is not the way I celebrate Christmas.’”

The point in all of this isn’t that gifts are bad or that no one should give gifts at Christmas. “Gift-giving is a beautiful tradition,” says Baydala. “It’s rooted in saying ‘I love you.’ It’s rooted in trying to communicate something to the person that says, ‘Here’s something you need or you want — and I know that about you, and I’m going to fill that for you.’” But that generous tradition has been twisted into a materialistic ritual that’s widely viewed as empty and destructive. That’s what needs changing, says Baydala. “We can save the gifting tradition, and get rid of the opulence and the waste by refocusing that towards the people that need it most.”

Enns agrees that gift-giving is a valuable tradition. “It is the glue that holds a community together,” he says. “But let’s not allow corporations to exploit that very important cohesive factor for their gain. Let’s find a way to keep giving gifts, but still honour the environment and the local economy.”

In past years, Enns has made wooden dolls and hardcover journals as gifts for family. Others offer to babysit for a night or cook a meal for a friend. And some give a simple acknowledgement to the important people in their lives. “That doesn’t have to be done with great gifts or anything,” says Meronek. “It can be a very sincere card with a handwritten message in it that says, ‘I really value your friendship.’” The point is to give something truly valuable, something thoughtful, instead of buying stuff just to fulfil misplaced expectations. “We put so much on ourselves that we forget that we have the power to make choices,” Meronek says.

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Eight alternatives to consumer Christmas

Doing away with mindless Christmas consumerism doesn’t mean you need to be a stingy Scrooge in December. Here are a few suggestions (culled from Buy Nothing Christmas, Facebook and our own imaginations) for ways to celebrate the season generously without buying a bunch of useless junk.

• Make your own gifts — Think about what you can do well, and then do it for someone else. Bake cookies. Knit hats. Write stories. Build picture frames. Create sock monkeys. Burn mix CDs. Design calendars from family photos. Put together a cookbook, etc.

• Donate cash — Instead of buying more stuff for family and friends who already have a lot, give the money to organizations that are working for social justice locally and globally. Spend the money where it will make a lasting difference.

• Volunteer — Plan a volunteer outing with friends and/or family. Need ideas? Volunteer Calgary posts a weekly list of holiday volunteer opportunities in the city on its website (www.volunteercalgary.ab.ca).

• Host a potluck — Invite a group of friends over to your place, and ask them each to bring a dish. Better yet, expand your invite list beyond friends and get to know your new neighbours or co-workers.

• Buy locally — Go to craft fairs and indie markets where local artisans are selling their wares. You can also buy locally online — the website Etsy, a marketplace for handmade items, has a “shop local” feature that lets you quickly find sellers in your city.

• Buy globally (but with a conscience) — Instead of buying at the mall and supporting multinational corporations, you can buy gifts from developing countries while directly supporting the artisans who made them. Stores like Ten Thousand Villages sell fair trade products, making sure that the people who made these items get a fair wage for their work.

• Make a memory — Plan a specific outing with family and/or friends. Possibilities: go on a long walk in your neighbourhood. Or leave the city for a hike or snowshoeing excursion. Take a daytrip somewhere none of you have been before.

• Give the gift of time — Draw up coupons for practical things you can do for friends and family like babysitting, cleaning and cooking.