VIRGO (AUG. 23 – SEPT. 22)

How do you think a moth feels when it realizes too late that it's neither the moon or even a light bulb that was beckoning, but a burning flame? Well, if that's got you stumped, sweetheart, you'll find out this weekend if you're not payin' close attention to the truth of your intentions!

LIBRA (SEPT. 23 – OCT. 22)

You'll realize that although lots of labour has brought you everything you've worked for, it's not really what you want. Kind of a bummer, huh? Even worse is the realization that the way to get what you really want is to give up what you've already worked so hard to get, but that's what happens when your equity's in sweat!

SCORPIO (OCT. 23 – NOV. 21)

Even though sometimes you're moody, there's no need to be a rudie. If you behave with grace, when next we face, I'll still exclaim, "Oh goody!"

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22 – DEC. 21)

Sure, you've got a bag of arrows, but that's no reason to go shootin' 'em off willy-nilly. When they run out, you're still gonna have to go all over hell's half-acre to reclaim 'em. Do you think there's an endless supply of 'em? The only thing there's an endless supply of is politicians and insects. Not that there's any correlation between the two....

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22 – JAN. 19)

Y'know, there's somethin' about an Earth sign at harvest time. It's like you exude a sympathetic aura of bountiful fruitfulness at the same time as your element. No wonder women and men will be attracted to you in one way or another all week. You represent the return on investment that they all seek!

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20 – FEB. 18)

Well, once again you've taken yourself in a totally different direction and now there's no looking back. With just a little bit of luck (like the kind you'll have before the weekend), you'll actually be able to afford to live in la-la land. It just might take a little longer than you expect, so don't go hirin' an interior decorator quite yet!

PISCES (FEB. 19 – MARCH 20)

Y'know that little agreement to disagree you've got goin' there? Well, it'll all change when some late-breaking news proves you right and them silly. Now of course you could rub their noses in it, but you've got way more class than that. Your smug li'l smile's all you'll need to lay 'em out flat!

ARIES (MARCH 21 – APRIL 19)

If you're still standin' when life sucks the most out of you, you're the strongest you've ever been. Strong enough for sure to suck all of it, and even more, back from life, like the biggest bong hit you ever took in college. Don't worry if it ain't the smoothest smoke and you choke 'cause you gotta cough to get off!

TAURUS (APRIL 20 – MAY 20)

Not like anyone has to tell a Taurus to slow down, but it's once again time to stop and smell the flowers. Winter's comin' and so is a big ol' heapin' helpin' of hard work to get you hunkered down for what may be one of the hardest we've had in a while. Till then you might as well just enjoy the sun's last big summer smiles!

GEMINI (MAY 21 – JUNE 20)

Go on! Do it! Take that step, 'cause once you do, you gotta keep walkin' in that direction. Well, what are you waitin' for? Sure, you're gonna have to walk for a while until you get to the next rest station, but don't be so damn lazy. This is the road for you. Can't you tell by the sign?

CANCER (JUNE 21 – JULY 22)

The edges are all pretty rough right now and it's tough to make up an overall image of what's happening by putting together all the jagged little pieces, Especially with you bein' edgy as well. Things will be a little better this week when the picture gets not exactly clearer, but fuzzier, to you. Y'know, like the soft-focus filter they use to make actors look better than they really do.

LEO (JULY 23 – AUG. 22)

So you really thought money was the solution to the situation you were in, huh? Unfortunately, contrary to popular suspension of disbelief, the world doesn't work that way. When are you gonna listen to the hippies and finally realize, like, all you need is love, man?

You can contact The Kid at cruisinthecosmos@hotmail.com.