| Film colourization is a dandy tool for turning black and white works of art into a ghastly miasma of pinks, yellows, beiges and burgundys. Advocates of the process like to point out that many viewers are prejudiced against black and white films, and that colourization gives such audiences the opportunity to enjoy old classics that they might otherwise have overlooked. Such advocates ignore the fact that these same audiences tend to shun old pictures in general, monochrome or otherwise, and are content to sit in their mobile homes, watching Jackass and Fear Factor.
While the practice of colourizing old films hasn’t achieved much good press, the technique itself has proven useful to filmmakers wishing to make "partially monochrome" films – black and white features with an unexpected splash of colour here and there. Check out some visually fascinating examples of this in Sin City (2005), Schindler’s List (1993) and Pleasantville (1998).
Legend Films is a company that’s trying to recapture public interest in colourized versions of monochrome classics. One of their most popular DVD releases is the "Special ‘Addiction’" of the rabid anti-marijuana cult classic, Reefer Madness. The disc thoughtfully includes the original monochrome version for purists, but you’ll need to watch the colourized track in order to enjoy the disc’s major selling point – a pointed and acerbic audio commentary by Mystery Science Theater 3000’s Michael J. Nelson. Nelson’s an old hand at wittily mocking creaky old movies, and he’s in pretty good form here, throwing in some clever zingers during the film’s many dull moments. Any scene stretched out with obvious padding immediately arouses his ire; "No! Don’t show her mixing a drink! Show her holding a mixed drink and I’ll infer that she mixed it!" he bellows at a particularly pointless beverage-preparation scene.
Reefer Madness itself is a goofy old flick, originally entitled Tell Your Children and intended to turn youngsters away from the evils of marijuana use. The reason it’s still popular today is because of the extremely earnest, ill-informed and hyper-exaggerated approach it takes to the subject. The film became a hit on college campuses in the ’60s and ’70s with young audiences who were astonished and amused by its sense of hysteria (in both senses of the word). Even so, the flick isn’t as berserk as you might have heard. In fact, it isn’t even the most insane "educational" film of the ’30s – Maniac (1934) makes Reefer Madness look eloquent and well-researched by comparison, and is a genuine must-see for aficionados of antique lunacy.
The folks at Legend Films know that people watch Reefer Madness to laugh at it, so instead of doing a realistic colourization job, they made the film look as garish and unsightly as possible. The result is so horrifyingly ugly that it actually enhances the camp value of the film, which is precisely the effect they were going for. Every neon-tinted detail offends the eye, from the hot pink barstools to the fetid yellow sweater-vest worn by the film’s wayward teen hero. Plus, each character’s "high" is tinted differently – one guy will exhale bright green ganja smoke, while others blow out vast clouds of pink or yellow.
A second commentary track allows the people who worked on the colour effects to giddily explain their contributions to the film. Both commentary tracks are entertaining, and even first-time viewers will want to select them, since the film itself has monumentally long breaks in the dialogue.
Incidentally, Mike Nelson also does humorous audio commentaries for other Legend Films fare, including Plan 9 from Outer Space (1959) and Night of the Living Dead (1968). In fact, he’s begun making downloadable audio commentaries he calls Rifftrax (www.rifftrax.com) that users can play on their computers or MP3 players while watching DVDs of stuff like Road House (1989) or Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace (1999). I think this is a great idea, and apparently I’m not the only one. Other websites such as www.dvdpodblast.com and www.mmmcommentaries.com have started providing similar audio files that offer the viewer a wide variety of ways to enjoy old favourites or to celebrate spectacular cinematic failures. It’s a brave new world. Soon you’ll be able to record your own audio commentary for Pirates of the Carribean 6: Fish Pirates versus Zombie Ninjas while watching it on your cellular phone and instantly broadcasting it on the net. Just please watch out for other drivers while doing so. |
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