>>REVIEW
STOMP THE YARD
STARRING Columbus Short, Meagan Good and Ne-Yo
DIRECTED BY Sylvain White
Welcome to Truth University, a place where high-fives and dance-offs abound and all the world is a Michael Jackson video. In this institution, you’ll learn how to carefully weave together movie clichés that rip off everything from Sister Act to The Mighty Ducks, as well as how to uphold racial stereotypes with the simple drop of an N-bomb and use of slang that you only vaguely understand. Degrees will be issued in a mere hour and 55 minutes.
Stomp The Yard would have you believe the following things – all conflicts are easily solved through aggressive dancing, joining a fraternity automatically makes you akin to Martin Luther King, Jr., and there are no white people in Atlanta. If you can buy into those things and suspend any notion of reason, this film is totally enjoyable. Unfortunately, it isn’t for the reasons screenwriter Robert Adetuyi was aiming for.
Much of the stilted dialogue – of which there is just enough to get from one plot-point to the next – is unintentionally funny, but make no mistake, this movie doesn’t exist for its firm grip on the English language. Stomp The Yard is a vehicle for choreographer Dave Scott.
Scott displays two types of dancing in the film. First, there’s street dancing, which involves the participants acting like they are having seizures. The second type is called stepping, which essentially looks like people valiantly fighting off a swarm of mosquitoes. Neither dance style translates well to film, as the contorted limbs and twitchy faces are cut to and away from so rapidly it’s hard to tell exactly what’s going on. As a result, the dance scenes come off as anti-climactic, especially the one that ends the film.
Underneath all of this is a nice performance by Columbus Short, who plays DJ, a troubled youngster who finds his way by joining a frat and leading its members to dance-off glory. Short is obviously most comfortable with the dancing, but he acquits himself well during dramatic moments, even when everyone else involved is either overacting or, even worse, under-acting.
Somehow, though, despite knowing exactly what’s going to happen five minutes into the movie, Stomp The Yard is compulsively watchable. It’s a perfect storm of underdog clichés, cheesy dialogue and six-pack abs. Even though you know it’s horrible, you can’t turn away. |
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