| Dear Josey,
I’ve had unprotected sex with two different women. When I ejaculated with my first partner, most of the liquid stayed inside afterwards. After I withdraw with my second partner, we have to make sure she doesn’t spill all over the place – and I’m not talking slow leak, but an explosive evacuation of semen. Which outcome is typical? On a related note, a female friend said her underwear gets moist for a couple of days after sex. Is this a normal reaction?
In An Explosive Situation
Dear Explosive,
As the old saying goes, what goes up must come down. It is perfectly natural for a gal to leak semen after unprotected intercourse. I even came across a fancy name for the stuff: effluvium seminis. So much more exotic sounding than "the wet spot," no?
As for there being a "typical" amount or expulsion method of the stuff, well, considering I’ve known vaginas to do everything from squeeze out a 10-pound baby to practising doodle art while holding a pencil, I’d say there’s nothing typical about ‘em or what they’re capable of. The tilt of a woman’s vagina, the strength of her PC muscles, and the angle at which you have sex are all factors in what a woman’s vagina decides to do with your sperm. That said, I haven’t heard of a woman exploding spunk out of her vagina unless it’s her own. I’m guessing gal two is more likely evacuating her G-spot than your sperm when you pull out. If she’s full of your come, well that’s coming out, too. As for the gal with the wet panties, once again, it’s normal for there to be some, ahem, effluvium seminis, post coitus, and even the occasional undie gush several hours afterward (usually when you’re standing in line at the bank or something equally inconvenient, eh girls?). Two days is pushing it, though. Could be your gal is also experiencing some of her own effluvium, in the form of vaginal discharge, either because she’s ovulating or any number of other reasons that girls ooze stuff at various points in the month (yes, you boys are lucky, aren’t you?). But again, as long as it’s not funky smelling or the colour of swamp water, it’s nothing your typical panty liner can’t handle. Oh, one last little thing. Why the fuck are you having unprotected sex with multiple partners?
Dear Josey,
I’ve been having a recurring rash on the head of me penis over the last month or so. The first time this happened, it disappeared after a week, but reappeared a few days later. I don’t want to see a doctor. What can I do?
Dear Head,
Oh, I don’t know, watch the skin of your penis turn into a pus-sy, foul-smelling infected mess? But I suppose letting a doctor look at your penis is much worse. I don’t know what you have. I don’t have your penis in front of me and I’m no doctor. It could be STI-related or it could simply be some sort of bacterial or fungal infection or even an allergic reaction. The thing is, assuming you maintain half-decent genital hygiene (if you’re uncircumcised, you need to scrub under the collar, too), there’s something more serious going on and you’ll need something stronger than soap and water to treat it. And for that you need a doctor. Don’t worry, they’ve seen much worse, trust me. Now, go already!
Dear Josey,
I recently lost my virginity, and after three awkward experiences, my man and I had a talk. He says that while giving head, I use my teeth and don't go hard enough. During sex when he is on top, he says I don't moan. When I am on top, he says I have no rhythm and that I should watch porn. I just want to be good in bed... any tips?
Dear Off,
Your guy sounds like a real charmer. Maybe you could start with this: "Sweetie, if you don't stop being a jerk, next time, I'll really use my teeth and bite your little weenie right off!"
Now, where was I? Oh yeah, if any guy told me to watch porn or that I didn't moan enough in bed, I'd make him moan and it wouldn't be with pleasure. C'mon, the guy's being an arse. While I appreciate both directness and your willingness to accept criticism, even little kids need positive encouragement to help them get better at things.
We all expect to be good at sex automatically but it actually takes practice. And being good in bed isn't about moaning or watching more porn.
As for blowjob technique, some guys like a little teeth action and some like things gentle. It's not about your ability – it's merely his personal taste.
Speaking of which, has he ever asked what do you want? Maybe when you figure out what's fun for you, you'll have something to moan about. |
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