| Dorothea Flengeris has noticed how unresponsive Calgary audiences can be when gathered at a local venue to watch a band. I know what she means.
I've played in a band once or twice, and the sweetest feeling I’ve ever had was to see people grooving to our music. On the other hand, I didn’t care if people chose to talk or drink or play pool or just stand or sit there, pick their nose and watch. As a musician, I’m not a monkey performing tricks for peanuts. I like my music and I like playing it, and I don’t do it for approval except perhaps from my bandmates, although I have to tell you a good response from the audience tends to kick yon almighty ass.
Some local musicians remind me of the kid in the neighbourhood who put on a play in his backyard and got upset because nobody was ready when he was. Playing to an audience without getting the audience’s attention first is like talking to someone when they’re not listening. There are certain courtesies when communicating, such as introductions and replies, even if you’re communicating with an electric guitar plugged into an amp set to 11. So here’s my advice to those who get up onstage and expect everyone to cream their pants just because you’re under the spotlight: wait for the audience to tell you or show you when they’re ready to listen.
I’m reminded of the late Andy Kaufman, who would literally stand onstage motionless and speechless until the room became deathly quiet or someone shouted at him to do something, then launch into his act. For him, the audience’s response was part of his performance, and it’s an excellent technique as much as it is respectful for those who have paid at least the price of a beer for the privilege of seeing you and your monkey pals perform.
When you have the majority of the room’s attention, but a few drunken louts continue to slobber at the mouth, go ahead and punch a guitar chord at that exact moment and so loud as to puncture unprepared eardrums and concuss inattentive brains. Remember, relaxing at the point of impact to reduce injury is a myth, as it has been scientifically proven that bracing yourself before impact will tend to reduce injury. It’ll teach them a lesson they will surely love, get their latent attention, and they might even raise their bottles and say, "yeahhh!" But dude, bands who don’t "connect" with an audience before starting to play, electing instead to play "at" instead of "with" them, will get a disassociated response – and people like Dorothea Flengeris and her friends will notice it, even if she doesn’t truly understand why.
The problem isn’t the audience, it’s the arrogant bands who think they deserve attention the moment they choose to step onstage and launch into their set, and journalists who wouldn’t know how to rock if their grandmothers banged their heads.
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