| It would be irresponsible to discuss all the positive aspects of drinking without occasionally exploring the darker side. And seeing as the holidays and overindulgence seem to go hand in bottle, now is the perfect time.
Since man first fermented sugar into alcohol, the hangover has plagued us – the miserable headaches, nauseous stomachs and general suffering that accompany those ambitious trips to the bar. And since the first morning after, remedies have been concocted in an effort to cure this elusive menace. Both science and voodoo have taken a crack at conquering the hangover, but neither has found a cure. To this day, every party-going teenager or martini-swilling lounge lizard lives in fear of morning’s most dangerous predator.
A quick trip on the Internet will tell you how big a problem hangovers are. Punch in the key word "hangover" and you will be inundated with millions of sites – some claim to cure you with a pill, others a secret family recipe, and a few will even dispel the rumours and give you the truth: there is no cure!
Does that mean there is nothing you can do to dull the pain and ease your suffering? Not at all. But first you need to understand what a hangover is and how your body responds to those pints of Guinness, slurps of wine and innocent sips of martinis.
When you drink any kind of alcohol, your body responds by metabolizing it. But this process takes time, so if you take ’em in faster than you break ’em down, you get build-up – and these toxins are a major cause of your morning temple tantrum. The exact cocktail of toxins depends on what kind of booze you’ve put in your belly, but they include ethanol, various byproducts of metabolism and congeners (which are produced during distillation).
Alcohol is broken down in the liver by the enzyme alcohol dehydrogenase (ADH). As your body gets used to drinking alcohol, the concentration of ADH builds in your system and gives you greater tolerance. In other words, the more you drink the more it takes to get you drunk. ADH needs water to function properly, but because alcohol is a diuretic, water can be in short supply when you’re on the sauce.
Lack of sleep is one of the most important components of the hangover. Alcohol is a depressant and can interrupt your body’s normal sleep patterns, keeping you from getting valuable REM time. When you don’t get this type of sleep you will feel sluggish and tired the following day.
When attempting to combat the hangover, you have to take into account all of these components – hangovers are not simple beasts, but complex, multifaceted creatures requiring both study and respect. The lack of water is one of the major causes of a hangover, but it is also the easiest to counter. By simply consuming a lot of water when you drink, you can alleviate some of the detrimental affects the following day.
Toxins, on the other hand, are a little more complicated. The exact composition of these is still unknown, but one of the chief offenders is congeners, nasty beasts present in all alcohol to varying degrees. Spirits like vodka and gin have less congeners, while bourbon and scotch tend to have more. This explains why some people swear off certain kinds of booze. Stories about tripled distilled vodkas that don’t give hangovers are false – they may contain fewer congeners due to filtration, but there are still other toxins as well as dehydration to deal with.
Ethanol is our final villain, and this one can’t be tamed. The only option is to drink things with less alcohol, like near-beer or low alcohol wine.
One of the big theories about hangovers is that mixing your booze will kill you, but does this really make a difference? The answer is yes – a little. Consuming various alcohols increases the array of toxins your body has to process, which can make it more difficult.
So what can you do if the damage is done? One popular solution is coffee, and while this can help with headaches by dilating blood vessels in your head, it is dangerous for its diuretic properties. And what of hair of the dog? Does a little more of last night’s poison make it all go away? Yeah, right – wouldn’t that be nice? Best-case scenario, it might delay it a little, but eventually it will make it even worse.
The truth is that only sleep and time can alleviate the suffering, so the next time you plan on tipping back a few too many, make sure it’s worth the pain. |
