| First off, I apologize if you don’t get the Count Floyd reference. Many moons ago there was a show called SCTV with a "scary" Count Vampire-type guy named Floyd who appeared from time to time to show scary films to kids.
Except they weren’t scary. Not even in a Martha Stewart kind of way. Floyd would get depressed and start crying because none of the kids were scared.
It was fine television. So, in the spirit of Halloween, I’ve channelled the power of Count Floyd to chill your very soul! What is the most terrifying, most menacing creature known to man? What image appears in your mind when you think of pure evil? What makes children run in horror and adults tremble?
Clowns.
John Wayne Gacey knew it. That kid in Poltergeist knew it. And now you can learn just how terrifying clowns can be at scaryornot.com, a site that lets you rate the creepiness of Bozo and his buddies. In addition to disturbing clown photos, you’ll also find a superb anti-clown resource that no clown-hater should be without, from Clownophobia Forums to games like Slap a Clown.
Another thing that creeps me out is dolls. And I’m not just talking about Barbie and her buddies. No, I’m talking about the little china dolls with their glass eyes that relentlessly peer into your soul. Oh sure, they look harmless, but the minute you turn your back they’re plotting with your Curious George monkey on how to make it look like an accident. Thankfully, you can avoid this deception by purchasing a doll you already know is evil at livingdeaddolls.com – a collection of cuties that are out for blood with no pretense of letting you live.
Now kids, wasn’t that scary? Aaaarrooooo! |
