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Booze by FFWD Staff Do you find yourself carefully analyzing each glass of wine you taste? Have you noticed that you are now swirling every beverage you drink, including milk and juice? Have you memorized the scores of certain wines from publications that rate them in this manner? If you answer yes to any of these questions, then you may already be a cork dork or, at the very least, well on your way to becoming one. Falling into this category can have its merits, depending on how you bandy about the knowledge you possess. Like most things in life, a little knowledge can be a dangerous thing, although in the case of wine, the worst thing that can happen is a waiter may be inclined to mock and belittle you in front of someone you want to impress. The following quiz is designed to help test your skills and perhaps avoid any such embarrassments. Good luck! 1. Randall Grahm is which of the following? a) One of California’s "Rhone Rangers" b) A bit nuts c) The owner and winemaker at Bonny Doon d) The owner and winemaker for Ca Del Solo e) All of the above 2. Which one of the following operates the world’s largest winery? a) Kendall Jackson b) Robert Mondavi c) E & J Gallo d) Miguel Torres e) Fortant de France 3. Bastardo is which of the following? a) A son-of-a-bitch of questionable parentage b) A Portuguese red grape varietal c) Stockwell Day’s nickname d) My nickname 4. Egg whites are used in which of the following winemaking steps? a) Scrambled and fed to portly vineyard workers b) To thicken red wines that tend to taste thin c) To clarify and stabilize new wines d) To be mixed with wild yeasts and grains for the production of Vin de Patisserie 5. Trockenbeerenauslese is what? a) German for foul-smelling pork products normally consumed with riesling b) A very sweet, rich German white wine c) The name given to the small children employed to clean the fermentation tanks d) A wine that is made to taste more like a strong beer 6. Botrytis Cinerea causes what? a) A nasty fungus that occurs on the feet from the treading of grapes b) Small clusters of grapes undergo a second fermentation and explode on the vine c) Bears eating the fruit affected by this condition become tame and and can be taught to ride a bike d) Grapes affected by this fungus shrivel and concentrate the natural sugars 7. The term free-run applies to which of the following? a) A bladder condition associated with the overconsumption of wine b) A wine festival in Spain that occurs during the harvest c) The term used by wine-makers for the juice that drains from a fermentation vessel from the weight of the fruit 8. Malolactic fermentation does what to wine? a) Turns it a milky colour b) Converts malic acid in new wine into lactic acid c) Makes it undrinkable for the lactose intolerant d) All of the above 9. Primitivo is which of the following? a) A red grape grown primarily in Southern Italy b) A red grape that is genetically similar to zinfandel c) A grape that makes a full-bodied, rich red wine d) All of the above 10. The term riddling applies to which? a) The turning of sparkling wine bottles to dislodge the deposits left over from fermentation b) The enjoyable act of quizzing a wine merchant on aspects of a wine that they (or anyone else) could not possibly know c) A method of spraying syrah/shiraz grapes with a pepper solution to discourage birds and other predators from eating the fruit d) A medical term that describes the formation of small holes in the liver as a result of drinking wine that comes in a box 11. The term brix is what? a) A reference to the colour of older red wines b) A scale for measuring the sugar levels in wine c) The scale used to measure the tonnage of fruit per acre d) The leftover skins, stems and seeds from the wine-making process, often used to make grappa 12. Chip budding is which of the following? a) A disgusting British culinary aberation that involves French fries, gravy and bread b) The theft of vine cuttings from famous vineyard sites, later used to establish new vineyards elsewhere c) A method for splicing one root stock to another d) The term used to describe erratic growth during bud break 13. Canopy management describes which of the following? a) Controlling one’s intake of tasty little hors d’oeuvres at wine tastings b) The jaunty angle at which one wears one’s chapeau while picking grapes c) A technique of vineyard management used to control yields, quality and disease – an essential component of viticulture 14. The term "terroir" translates to what? a) A scoundrel of the vineyard, also known as a "holy terroir" b) The French term for dirt c) The French term for a particular region d) The term used to describe the various natural elements that affect a vineyard, such as climate, soil composition, topography and rainfall 15. Wines that are heavily oaked appeal to which of the following? a) The editors of Wine Spectator b) A dying breed of California winemakers c) A (slowly) dying breed of Australian winemakers d) All of the above Answers: 1. e, 2. c, 3. b, 4. c, 5. b, 6. d, 7. c, 8. b, 9. d, 10. a, 11. b, 12. c, 13. c, 14. d, 15. d How did you score? If you got all of the answers right, you are well on your way to cork dorkdom. If you got most of the answers right, you can safely navigate a wine list without fear of intimidation. If you got less than half right, you should probably stick to drinking hooch. Cheers! CORK AND CANVAS Cork and Canvas 2000, an annual wine and art festival in support of the Calgary Philharmonic Orchestra, runs from March 17 to April 3. Festival events include: a Napa Valley Vintners Association black tie reception and dinner; a veritcal wine tasting by the Jordan Winery of Sonoma, California; a California Wine Fair; and a wine and art auction. For more information or to purchase tickets call Susan Brown 571-0283, or visit the Web site at www.htn.com/cork&canvas.

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