FFWD Weekly
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Cruising The Cosmos by The Kid HOROSCOPES FOR APRIL 22 TO APRIL 28 TAURUS: Bein' that you ain't no joker, you get the message. It's time to lay your cards out on the table, no matter what you're holdin' in your hand. Yep, it's the moment of truth. You show ’em yours and they show you theirs. Don't be nervous, though. Those buggers are bluffin'! GEMINI: This weekend you'll feel so worn out you'll want to make a truce and call it even. Heck, you'll be so plumb-tuckered out you might even do somethin' silly like surrenderin'. Well, you'll be a whole lot happier if you stick to your six-guns, pardner. ’Cause y'see, when the dust clears, it's only gonna be you left standin'. CANCER: Okay, so you've been enlightened in an epiphany. So what? You think that makes you a "higher" being or somethin'? It may look that way, but only ’cause you put yourself up on a pedestal. And the higher up it is, the further you're gonna fall when somebody "lower" than you knocks it over. LEO: Okay, let's be honest here. You can be gracious and just, entering into an agreement with your adversary and coming to an arrangement that benefits the both of you. But the truth is you're a competitive cat and you won't really be happy unless you can kick their ass, rub their nose in it, point at ’em and shout "In your face!" VIRGO: You seem to think that you'll have security if you're always in control of the situation. Hmmmmmm. One o' them there control freaks, huh? Well, swap some control for more co-operation and you'll find that your co-operators do more work than you ever could. Why don'tcha just let ’em? LIBRA: Look, no matter how hard you try and try, you just ain't gonna figure love out. There's no way to take it apart to see how it works and, if you're dumb enough to try, there's almost no chance you'll get it put back together. You can't dissect a living specimen, and unless it's livin', it ain't love. SCORPIO: Sometimes that quick ’n' simple solution that slides along in the nick of time isn't the one to get you out of deep doo-doo. In fact, the more you're sure it's your way out, the deeper you'll get. It's kinda like struggling in quicksand – the more you fight, the faster you're gonna sink. SAGITTARIUS: Now that you finally hold the upper hand, you've begun to ask yourself why it all seems so bland. Well, in a balanced relationship between equals, love is a two-way street. How can you love ’em when they're groveling at your feet? CAPRICORN: Don't rush into anything silly this weekend, swifty. You may think it's all over and the struggle has subsided, but that ain't necessarily so. Upon further reflection you'll find you haven't reached the end, but at least you're still headed in the same direction. That is unless you make a complete turn, of course. AQUARIUS: Whatever it is you're tryin' to get, it's gonna come a lot quicker if you can play-act the proper part to other people. Just make sure you don't get too deep into the method acting, though. If you completely become someone else, they won't see what you've been waitin' for when it finally finds its way into the picture. PISCES: Wanted: Big fish from small pond for opening in medium-sized lake. On-the-pond training provided. Pay commensurate with experience. Benefits include lots of space to swim in, plenty of room to grow and more to eat. Apply within. ARIES: Now that times ain't so tough and things are workin' your way, you wanna enjoy the windfall all by your lonesome. Well, greedy cheeks, just so you know, there ain't no surer way to put an end to your fortunes than to have the buck stop with you. Halt your hoard-o-rama and let go of your fruits so new seeds can be sown for you.

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